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Showing 1-10 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by contributor | ||||||
1. | No one in this town could catch any fish except .. | Jokes Rating: |
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No one in this town could catch any fish except this one man The game warden asked him how he did it so the man told the game warden that he would take him fishing the next day... Once they got to the middle of the lake the man took out a stick of dynamite, lit it, and threw it in the water. After the explosion fish started floating to the top of the water. The man took out a net and started picking up the fish. The game warden told him that this was illegal. The man took out another stick of dynamite and lit it. He then handed it to the game warden and said " are you going to fish or talk?" | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 1 |  | |||
2. | "Do you really believe your husband when he ... | Jokes Rating: |
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"Do you really believe your husband when he tells you he goes fishing every weekend?" asked Jane's best friend. "Why shouldn't I?" said Jane. "Well, maybe he is having an affair?" "No way" said Jane "he never returns with any fish..." | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 2 | | |||
3. | One day a rather inebriated ice fisherman drilled | Jokes Rating: |
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One day a rather inebriated ice fisherman drilled a hole in the ice and peered into the hole and a loud voice said, "There are no fish down there." He walked several yards away and drilled another hole and peered into the hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there." He then walked about 50 yards away and drilled another hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there." He looked up into the sky and asked, "God, is that you?" "No, you idiot," the voice said, "it's the rink manager." | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 3 | | |||
4. | A priest was walking along the cliffs at Dover ... | Jokes Rating: |
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A priest was walking along the cliffs at Dover when he came upon two locals pulling another man ashore on the end of a rope. "That's what I like to see," said the priest, "A man helping his fellow man." As he was walking away, one local remarked to the other, "Well, he sure doesn't know the first thing about shark fishing." | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 4 | | |||
5. | Q. What did the fish say when it hit a concrete .. | Jokes Rating: |
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Q. What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall A. "Dam!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 5 | | |||
6. | I was given the ultimatum 3 weeks ago She said ... | Jokes Rating: |
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I was given the ultimatum 3 weeks ago. She said "it's me or your fishing." Gee I miss her. | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 6 | | |||
7. | It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out .. | Jokes Rating: |
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It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line, and waited patiently for a bite He was there for almost an hour, without even a nibble, when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice next to him. The young boy dropped his fishing line and minutes later he hooked a Largemouth Bass. The old man couldn't believe his eyes but chalked it up to plain luck. Shortly thereafter, the young boy pulled in another large catch. The young boy kept catching fish after fish. Finally, the old man couldn't take it any longer. "Son" he said, "I've been here for over an hour without even a nibble. You've been here only a few minutes and have caught a half dozen fish! How do you do it?" The boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm." "What was that?" the old man asked. Again the boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm." "Look," said the old man, "I can't understand a word you're saying." The boy spat the bait into his hand and said... "You have to keep the worms warm!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 7 | | |||
8. | Q: Where do fish keep their money? | Jokes Rating: |
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Q: Where do fish keep their money? A: In the river bank. | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 8 | | |||
9. | Two morons rent a boat and go fishing.They ... | Jokes Rating: |
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Two morons rent a boat and go fishing. They catch a lot of fish and return to the shore. 1st moron: I hope you remember the spot where we caught all those fish. 2nd moron: Yes, I made an 'X' on the side of the boat to mark the spot. 1st moron: You idiot! How do you know we'll get the same boat? | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 9 | | |||
10. | What is the difference between a catfish and a ... | Jokes Rating: |
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What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish! | ||||||
Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 10 | | |||
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