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Showing 11-20 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by worst jokes

11.

Mother to daughter advice:Cook a man a fish ..

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Mother to daughter advice:

Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.

But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 24

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12.

One day while driving home from his fishing trip .

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One day while driving home from his fishing trip in the pouring rain, a man got a flat tire outside a monastery

A monk came out and invited him inside to have dinner and spend the night. The motorist accepted. That night he had a wonderful dinner of fish and chips.

He decided to compliment the chef. Entering the kitchen, he asked the cook, "Are you the fish friar?"

"No," the man replied, "I'm the chip monk."



Anonymous

19th Dec 2002

JokesID: 30

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13.

What is the definition of a

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What is the definition of a 'Fisherman's Thumb'

- A temporary hook holder

What is the definition of a 'Fisherman's Knot'?

- The insecure connection between your fly hook and your
fishing line

What is the definition of a 'live bait'?

- The biggest fish you will handle all day

What is the definition of a 'Treble Hook'?

- A hook that trebles the odds of you catching a fish but
quadruples the odds of you getting it caught in your thumb

What is the definition of an 'Angler'?

- An obsessive individual who owns a house that is falling
down due to neglect



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 38

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14.

How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate ...

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How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate before his wife throws him out?

I don't know the answer but I think I'm nearly there.



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 39

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15.

The Reverend McDreep encountered one of his ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



The Reverend McDreep encountered one of his parishioners returning from a days fishing and engaged him in conversation.

"Ah Lachlan" he began in his best preaching tone "You are a fine fisherman, but I am a fisher of men".

Lachlan, determined to get home for his tea, replied "Aye, I was passing your kirk (church) last Sunday and looked in the window, but you hadn't caught many..."



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 44

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16.

Two guys go on a fishing trip. They rent all the .

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Two guys go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune.

The first day they go fishing they don't catch a thing. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men finally catches a fish.

As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realise that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"

"Wow!" says the othe guy "It's a good job we didn't catch any more!"



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 45

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17.

I got a new fly rod and reel for my ...

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I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife...

...best trade I ever made.



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 46

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18.

Q. Where do fish sleep?

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Q. Where do fish sleep?

A. In a river bed



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 47

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19.

"I caught a twenty pound salmon last week." ...

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"I caught a twenty pound salmon last week."

"Were there any witnesses?"

"There sure were. If there hadn't been, it would have been forty pounds."



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 51

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20.

The Fishing season hasn

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



The fishing season hasn't opened and a fisherman who doesn't have a license, is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks "Any luck?"

"Any luck? This is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday" he boasts.

"Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am?" asks the stranger.

"Nope."

"Well, meet the new game warden."

"Oh," gulped the fisherman. "Well, do you know who I am?"

"Nope".

"Meet the biggest liar in the state."



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 56

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