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Showing 31-40 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes rating

31.

What is the difference between a catfish and a ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?

One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 10

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32.

I didn't see you in church last Sunday ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



"I didn't see you in church last Sunday, Nigel. I hear you were out playing football instead."

"That's not true, vicar. And I've got the fish to prove it!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 14

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33.

Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ran out of bait.

The first priest got up and walk across the water to get some more bait.

After 2 hours they ran out of bait again and the second priest said he would go get more bait...so he got up and walk across the water.

After 3 hours of fishing they ran out of bait again and the third priest said he would get more bait. So he stepped out of the boat and went straight to the bottom.

The first priest turned to the second priest and asked, "Should we have told him where the rocks were? "



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 18

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34.

Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were having a great day catching fish.

The first blonde said "This is such a great spot, we need to mark it so we can come back."

The second blonde proceeded to put a mark on the side of the boat.

The first blonde asked "What are you doing?"

The second blonde replied "Marking the spot."

"Don't be stupid" the first blonde said. "What if we don't get the same boat next time?"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 19

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35.

A man phones home from his office and tells his ..

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



A man phones home from his office and tells his wife: "Something has just come up. I have a chance to go fishing for a week. Its the opportunity of a lifetime and we leave right away. So pack my clothes, my fishing equipment and especially my blue silk pajamas. I'll be home in and hour to pick them up."

He goes home in a hurry and grabs everything and rushes off.

A week later he returns.

His wife asks: "Did you have a good trip, dear?."

He says "Oh yes it was great. But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."

His wife smiles and says, "Oh no I didn't. I put them in your tackle box!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 20

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36.

Two Irishmen were walking down the street ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



Two Irishmen were walking down the street with two salmon each under their arms.

Two other Irishmen walking in the opposite direction see the two lucky fishermen and ask " how did you catch those ?"

Well its like this! Michael here holds my legs over the bridge, and I grab the salmon as they swim up the river. We got four salmon A great days fishing!

So the fishless pair look at each other and agree to give it a try.
They get to the bridge and Sean calls to his friend "hold my legs now Paddy".

Well he is hanging there upside down for thirty minutes when he suddenly cries.. "pull me up, pull me up!!"

Paddy asks " do you have a fish Sean?"............

No replies Sean, "there's a bloody train coming!!!!!!!!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 21

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37.

The Three Fishermen and the Mermaid ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



The Three Fishermen and the Mermaid

Three fishermen were fishing when they came upon a mermaid, the mermaid offered them one wish each so the first fisherman said: "double my I.Q" so the mermaid did it and to his surprise he started reciting shakespeare.

Then the second fisherman said: "triple my I.Q." and sure enough the mermaid did it and amazingly he started doing math problems he didn't know existed.

The third fisherman was so impressed he asked the mermaid to quadruple his I.Q and the mermaid said "Are you sure about this? It will change your whole life!" the fisherman said "yes" so the mermaid turned him into a woman...



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 22

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38.

Mother to daughter advice:Cook a man a fish ..

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



Mother to daughter advice:

Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.

But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 24

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39.

A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort in .

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort in northern Minnesota. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read.

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a short nap. Although she isn't familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat.

She motors out a short distance, anchors, and continues to read her book. Along comes the game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside her and says,"Good morning, Ma'am, what are you doing?"

"Reading my book," she replies, thinking isn't that obvious?

"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her.

"But officer, I'm not fishing. Can't you see that?"

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with rape," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.

"That's true, but you do have all the equipment."

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.



Anonymous

19th Dec 2002

JokesID: 28

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40.

Which fish can perform operations ?

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



Q. Which fish can perform operations?

A. A Sturgeon !



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 27

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