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The Best Fishing Jokes on the Internet ! | <<< Previous | Next >>> | Showing 31-40 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes score
| 31. | Slow Down! | Jokes Score: | 10269   |
| A cop pulls a guy over for speeding and the guy's defence was, "I was just going with the flow of traffic."
The Cop's response... "Ever go fishing?"
"Yeah...."
"Ever catch ALL the fish?" |
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| Joe | 2nd Nov 2003 | JokesID: 66 |  |
| 32. | A couple of young guys were fishing at their ... | Jokes Score: | 10264   |
| A couple of young guys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the game warden.
Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell and hot on his heels came the game warden.
After about a half mile, the guy stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath and the game warden finally caught up to him.
"Let's see yer fishin license, boy!" the warden gasped.
With that, the guy pulled out his wallet and gave the game warden a valid fishing license.
"Well, son," said the Game Warden. "You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"
"Yes sir," replied the young feller. "But my friend back there, well, he don't have one..." |
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| Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 13 |  |
| 33. | Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were ... | Jokes Score: | 10254   |
| Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were having a great day catching fish.
The first blonde said "This is such a great spot, we need to mark it so we can come back."
The second blonde proceeded to put a mark on the side of the boat.
The first blonde asked "What are you doing?"
The second blonde replied "Marking the spot."
"Don't be stupid" the first blonde said. "What if we don't get the same boat next time?" |
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| Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 19 |  |
| 34. | A man was surf fishing along the beach when he ... | Jokes Score: | 10205   |
| A man was surf fishing along the beach when he found a bottle. He looked around but didn't see anyone so he opened it
A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, "I am so grateful to get out of that bottle that I will grant you any wish, but I can only grant one."
The man thought for a while and finally said, "I have always wanted to go to Hawaii and fish along the beautiful beaches of Hawaii. I've never been able to go because I cannot fly. Airplanes are much too frightening for me. On a boat, I see all that water and I become very claustrophobic. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii."
The genie thought for a few minutes and finally said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved. Consider all the piling needed to hold up a highway and how deep they would have to go to reach the bottom of the ocean. Imagine all the pavement needed. No, that really is just too much to ask."
The man thought for a few minutes and then told the genie, "There is one other thing I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with, when they want attention, when they don't. Basically, what makes them tick."
The genie thought for a while and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?" |
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| Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 55 |  |
| 35. | Q. What is the difference between a fish and a ... | Jokes Score: | 10191   |
| Q. What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
A. You can't tuna fish. |
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| Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 42 |  |
| 36. | How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate ... | Jokes Score: | 10134   |
| How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate before his wife throws him out?
I don't know the answer but I think I'm nearly there. |
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| Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 39 |  |
| 37. | Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman . | Jokes Score: | 10127   |
| Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.
Fishing rule #2: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.
Fishing rule #3: Fishing will do a lot for a man but it won't make him truthful. |
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| Anonymous | 19th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 31 |  |
| 38. | Two Irishmen were walking down the street ... | Jokes Score: | 10112   |
| Two Irishmen were walking down the street with two salmon each under their arms.
Two other Irishmen walking in the opposite direction see the two lucky fishermen and ask " how did you catch those ?"
Well its like this! Michael here holds my legs over the bridge, and I grab the salmon as they swim up the river. We got four salmon A great days fishing!
So the fishless pair look at each other and agree to give it a try.
They get to the bridge and Sean calls to his friend "hold my legs now Paddy".
Well he is hanging there upside down for thirty minutes when he suddenly cries.. "pull me up, pull me up!!"
Paddy asks " do you have a fish Sean?"............
No replies Sean, "there's a bloody train coming!!!!!!!!" |
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| Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 21 |  |
| 39. | Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river . | Jokes Score: | 10049   |
| Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses."
"We don't have any." replied the first blonde.
"Well, if your going to fish, you need fishing licenses." said the Game Warden.
"But officer," replied the second blonde,"we aren't fishing. All we have are magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the ottom of the river."
The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. "Well, I know of no law against it," said the Game Warden, "take all the debris you want." And with that, the Game Warden left.
As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. "What a dumb Fish Cop," the second blonde said to the other two, "doesn't he know that there are steelhead in this river?!" |
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| Anonymous | 16th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 25 |  |
| 40. | Two guys go on a fishing trip. They rent all the . | Jokes Score: | 10028   |
| Two guys go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune.
The first day they go fishing they don't catch a thing. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men finally catches a fish.
As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realise that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"
"Wow!" says the othe guy "It's a good job we didn't catch any more!" |
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| Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 45 |  |
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