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Showing 31-40 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes score

31.

I didn't see you in church last Sunday ...

Jokes Score:

13361  



"I didn't see you in church last Sunday, Nigel. I hear you were out playing football instead."

"That's not true, vicar. And I've got the fish to prove it!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 14

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32.

Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were ...

Jokes Score:

13354  



Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were having a great day catching fish.

The first blonde said "This is such a great spot, we need to mark it so we can come back."

The second blonde proceeded to put a mark on the side of the boat.

The first blonde asked "What are you doing?"

The second blonde replied "Marking the spot."

"Don't be stupid" the first blonde said. "What if we don't get the same boat next time?"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 19

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33.

The Reverend McDreep encountered one of his ...

Jokes Score:

13350  



The Reverend McDreep encountered one of his parishioners returning from a days fishing and engaged him in conversation.

"Ah Lachlan" he began in his best preaching tone "You are a fine fisherman, but I am a fisher of men".

Lachlan, determined to get home for his tea, replied "Aye, I was passing your kirk (church) last Sunday and looked in the window, but you hadn't caught many..."



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 44

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34.

A couple of young guys were fishing at their ...

Jokes Score:

13330  



A couple of young guys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the game warden.

Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell and hot on his heels came the game warden.

After about a half mile, the guy stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath and the game warden finally caught up to him.

"Let's see yer fishin license, boy!" the warden gasped.

With that, the guy pulled out his wallet and gave the game warden a valid fishing license.

"Well, son," said the Game Warden. "You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"

"Yes sir," replied the young feller. "But my friend back there, well, he don't have one..."



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 13

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35.

Two Irishmen were walking down the street ...

Jokes Score:

13219  



Two Irishmen were walking down the street with two salmon each under their arms.

Two other Irishmen walking in the opposite direction see the two lucky fishermen and ask " how did you catch those ?"

Well its like this! Michael here holds my legs over the bridge, and I grab the salmon as they swim up the river. We got four salmon A great days fishing!

So the fishless pair look at each other and agree to give it a try.
They get to the bridge and Sean calls to his friend "hold my legs now Paddy".

Well he is hanging there upside down for thirty minutes when he suddenly cries.. "pull me up, pull me up!!"

Paddy asks " do you have a fish Sean?"............

No replies Sean, "there's a bloody train coming!!!!!!!!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 21

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36.

Reasons Why Boats Are Better Than Women: ...

Jokes Score:

13216  



Reasons Why Boats Are Better Than Women:

Boats only need their fluids changed every year.

Boats curves never sag.

Boats last longer.

Boats don't get pregnant.

You can ride a Boat any time of the month.

Boats don't have parents.

Boats don't whine unless something is really wrong.

You can share your Boat with your friends.

If your Boat makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler.

You only need to get a new belt for your Boat when the old one is really worn.

If your Boat smokes, you can do something about it.

Boats don't care about how many other Boats you have ridden.

When riding, you and your Boat both arrive at the same time.

Boats don't care about how many other Boats you have.

Boats don't mind if you look at other Boats, or if you buy Boating magazines.

If your Boat is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.

You can have a beer while riding your Boat.

You don't have to be jealous of the guy that works on your Boat.

You don't have to deal with priests or blood-tests to register your Boat.

You don't have to convince your Boat that you're a Boater and that you think that all Boats are equals.

If you say bad things to your Boat, you don't have to apologise before you can ride it again.

You can ride a Boat as long as you want and it won't get sore.

Your parents don't remain in touch with your old Boat after you dump it.

Boats always feel like going for a ride.

Boats don't insult you if you are a bad boater.

Boats don't care if you are late.

You don't have to take a shower before riding your Boat.

It's always ok to use tie downs on your Boats.

If your Boat doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.

You can't get diseases from a Boat you don't know very well.



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 15

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37.

How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate ...

Jokes Score:

13203  



How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate before his wife throws him out?

I don't know the answer but I think I'm nearly there.



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 39

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38.

I am NEVER going to take my wife fishing with me,

Jokes Score:

13167  



Two guys are talking about fishing. One says to the other, "I am NEVER going to take my wife fishing with me, ever again!"

"That bad, huh"

"She did everything wrong! She did everything wrong! She talked too much, made the boat rock constantly, tried to stand up in the boat, baited the hook wrong, used the wrong lures and WORST of all she caught more fish than me!"



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 41

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39.

Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman .

Jokes Score:

13065  



Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.

Fishing rule #2: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.

Fishing rule #3: Fishing will do a lot for a man but it won't make him truthful.



Anonymous

19th Dec 2002

JokesID: 31

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40.

Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ...

Jokes Score:

13032  



Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ran out of bait.

The first priest got up and walk across the water to get some more bait.

After 2 hours they ran out of bait again and the second priest said he would go get more bait...so he got up and walk across the water.

After 3 hours of fishing they ran out of bait again and the third priest said he would get more bait. So he stepped out of the boat and went straight to the bottom.

The first priest turned to the second priest and asked, "Should we have told him where the rocks were? "



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 18

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