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Showing 41-50 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes rating

41.

A small town Doctor was famous in the area for ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



A small town Doctor was famous in the area for always catching large fish.

One day while he was on one of his frequent fishing trips he got a call that a woman at a neighboring farm was giving birth. He rushed to her aid and delivered a healthy baby boy.

The farmer had nothing to weigh the baby with so the Doctor used his fishing scales.

The baby weighed 22 lbs 10 oz..



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 43

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42.

Two guys go on a fishing trip. They rent all the .

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



Two guys go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune.

The first day they go fishing they don't catch a thing. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men finally catches a fish.

As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realise that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"

"Wow!" says the othe guy "It's a good job we didn't catch any more!"



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 45

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43.

"I caught a twenty pound salmon last week." ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



"I caught a twenty pound salmon last week."

"Were there any witnesses?"

"There sure were. If there hadn't been, it would have been forty pounds."



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 51

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44.

I was glad when one fish got away...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



I was glad when one fish got away.

There just wasn't room in the boat for both of us!



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 52

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45.

The manager of a small business and his secretary

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



The manager of a small business and his secretary decided to go over to her place for some "gymnastics". Afterwards, they both fall asleep

When the manager wakes up and looks at his watch, he discovers that it is after 8 o'clock in the evening.

He jumps up in a panic wondering what he's going to say to his wife. He tells the secretary to quickly take his shoes out into the yard and rub them around in the grass. Then he finishes dressing and goes home.

When the man opens the door to the house, his wife is standing in the doorway fuming and asks him where the hell he's been until 8:30 in the evening?

The man calmly replies that he and his secretary are having an affair and that they had fallen asleep after going to her place this afternoon.

His wife looked at him very carefully and when she saw the state of his shoes, she exclaimed: "You liar, you've been FISHING!"



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 54

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46.

A man was surf fishing along the beach when he ...

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



A man was surf fishing along the beach when he found a bottle. He looked around but didn't see anyone so he opened it

A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, "I am so grateful to get out of that bottle that I will grant you any wish, but I can only grant one."

The man thought for a while and finally said, "I have always wanted to go to Hawaii and fish along the beautiful beaches of Hawaii. I've never been able to go because I cannot fly. Airplanes are much too frightening for me. On a boat, I see all that water and I become very claustrophobic. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii."

The genie thought for a few minutes and finally said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved. Consider all the piling needed to hold up a highway and how deep they would have to go to reach the bottom of the ocean. Imagine all the pavement needed. No, that really is just too much to ask."

The man thought for a few minutes and then told the genie, "There is one other thing I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with, when they want attention, when they don't. Basically, what makes them tick."

The genie thought for a while and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?"



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 55

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47.

Taxidermist

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



A taxidermist was driving through Arkanas when he though he would stop at a local bar and have a beer.The locals didn't like outsiders in their bar and when he entered he was greeted with dirty stares and low mumbles.

He went to the bartender and ask for a beer.The bartender looked the man over and than went to get his beer. When the bartender returned with his beer he asked the man "what do you do?"

The man replied "I'm a taxidermist."

The bartender replied "Taxidermist? what is that."

The man replied "Well,I mount animals,birds,and fish."

With that said the bartender turned to the other men in the bar and said "It's ok boys he's one of us".



Shark

7th Nov 2003

JokesID: 70

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48.

What is the fastest fish in the water?

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Q. What is the fastest fish in the water?

A. A motopike



Gooooo away

20th Nov 2003

JokesID: 72

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49.

Cart Fishing

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



Two fishermen were talking about the good old days....

One says, "when I was a kid there were so many fish here I could always catch a few."

The other says, "when I was a kid here we used a horse and cart and got enough fish to sell at the market."

"How did you do that then?"

"Well, we had this good old horse and we used to back the cart down into the water and put treacle on his tail. The flies got stuck in the treacle and when the fish jumped out of the water for the flies that good old horse just kicked them into the cart. We had a load of fish in no time!"



Anonymous

20th Nov 2003

JokesID: 77

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50.

Fish trap

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Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.8 Star



This fisherman goes to the river to check an illegal fish trap that he owns. He looks around to make sure there are no Fishing Inspectors about and proceeds to pull the fish trap out to check it.

An Inspector steps out of the bushes, "Ahha!" he said and the fisherman spun around and yelled "Shiiiit!". The Inspector, who wasn't expecting such a response said "Settle down, I'm the Fishing Inspector". "Thank God for that" said the fisherman, "I thought you were the bugger who owned this fish trap".



Leatherpot

10th Dec 2003

JokesID: 78

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