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Showing 41-50 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes rating

41.

Live bait

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.7 Star



A local fisherman returning from a fishing trip with 6 large size salmon in his creel. Nosy Parker comes along and asks if the man been fishing. "Yer!" replied our stalwart. Asked what bait he had been using our hero replied that he had used chewing tobacco. Nosey asked how one used chewing tobacco as bait, and our man replied, "I put the tobacco on the hook in the normal way, cast in the normal way and when the fish strikes I haul back on the line to hook it. When the fish comes up to spit, I hit it on the head with but of my rod!" Needless to say there were no more questions.



MDC

16th May 2004

JokesID: 93

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42.

Two morons rent a boat and go fishing.They ...

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Two morons rent a boat and go fishing. They catch a lot of fish and return to the shore.

1st moron: I hope you remember the spot where we caught all those fish.

2nd moron: Yes, I made an 'X' on the side of the boat to mark the spot.

1st moron: You idiot! How do you know we'll get the same boat?



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 9

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43.

What is the difference between a catfish and a ...

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?

One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 10

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44.

A couple of young guys were fishing at their ...

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



A couple of young guys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the game warden.

Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell and hot on his heels came the game warden.

After about a half mile, the guy stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath and the game warden finally caught up to him.

"Let's see yer fishin license, boy!" the warden gasped.

With that, the guy pulled out his wallet and gave the game warden a valid fishing license.

"Well, son," said the Game Warden. "You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"

"Yes sir," replied the young feller. "But my friend back there, well, he don't have one..."



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 13

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45.

Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ...

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ran out of bait.

The first priest got up and walk across the water to get some more bait.

After 2 hours they ran out of bait again and the second priest said he would go get more bait...so he got up and walk across the water.

After 3 hours of fishing they ran out of bait again and the third priest said he would get more bait. So he stepped out of the boat and went straight to the bottom.

The first priest turned to the second priest and asked, "Should we have told him where the rocks were? "



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 18

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46.

Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were ...

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were having a great day catching fish.

The first blonde said "This is such a great spot, we need to mark it so we can come back."

The second blonde proceeded to put a mark on the side of the boat.

The first blonde asked "What are you doing?"

The second blonde replied "Marking the spot."

"Don't be stupid" the first blonde said. "What if we don't get the same boat next time?"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 19

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47.

A man phones home from his office and tells his ..

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



A man phones home from his office and tells his wife: "Something has just come up. I have a chance to go fishing for a week. Its the opportunity of a lifetime and we leave right away. So pack my clothes, my fishing equipment and especially my blue silk pajamas. I'll be home in and hour to pick them up."

He goes home in a hurry and grabs everything and rushes off.

A week later he returns.

His wife asks: "Did you have a good trip, dear?."

He says "Oh yes it was great. But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."

His wife smiles and says, "Oh no I didn't. I put them in your tackle box!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 20

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48.

Two Irishmen were walking down the street ...

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Two Irishmen were walking down the street with two salmon each under their arms.

Two other Irishmen walking in the opposite direction see the two lucky fishermen and ask " how did you catch those ?"

Well its like this! Michael here holds my legs over the bridge, and I grab the salmon as they swim up the river. We got four salmon A great days fishing!

So the fishless pair look at each other and agree to give it a try.
They get to the bridge and Sean calls to his friend "hold my legs now Paddy".

Well he is hanging there upside down for thirty minutes when he suddenly cries.. "pull me up, pull me up!!"

Paddy asks " do you have a fish Sean?"............

No replies Sean, "there's a bloody train coming!!!!!!!!"



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 21

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49.

One day while driving home from his fishing trip .

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



One day while driving home from his fishing trip in the pouring rain, a man got a flat tire outside a monastery

A monk came out and invited him inside to have dinner and spend the night. The motorist accepted. That night he had a wonderful dinner of fish and chips.

He decided to compliment the chef. Entering the kitchen, he asked the cook, "Are you the fish friar?"

"No," the man replied, "I'm the chip monk."



Anonymous

19th Dec 2002

JokesID: 30

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50.

Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman .

Jokes Rating:

Fishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 StarFishing Jokes Rating:  2.6 Star



Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.

Fishing rule #2: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.

Fishing rule #3: Fishing will do a lot for a man but it won't make him truthful.



Anonymous

19th Dec 2002

JokesID: 31

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