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The Best Fishing Jokes on the Internet ! | ||||||
Showing 51-60 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by contributor | ||||||
51. | I was glad when one fish got away... | Jokes Rating: |
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I was glad when one fish got away. There just wasn't room in the boat for both of us! | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 52 |  | |||
52. | What do you call a deaf fishing boat captain?. . | Jokes Rating: |
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What do you call a deaf fishing boat captain? Anything you like, he can't hear you. | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 53 | | |||
53. | The manager of a small business and his secretary | Jokes Rating: |
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The manager of a small business and his secretary decided to go over to her place for some "gymnastics". Afterwards, they both fall asleep When the manager wakes up and looks at his watch, he discovers that it is after 8 o'clock in the evening. He jumps up in a panic wondering what he's going to say to his wife. He tells the secretary to quickly take his shoes out into the yard and rub them around in the grass. Then he finishes dressing and goes home. When the man opens the door to the house, his wife is standing in the doorway fuming and asks him where the hell he's been until 8:30 in the evening? The man calmly replies that he and his secretary are having an affair and that they had fallen asleep after going to her place this afternoon. His wife looked at him very carefully and when she saw the state of his shoes, she exclaimed: "You liar, you've been FISHING!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 54 | | |||
54. | A man was surf fishing along the beach when he ... | Jokes Rating: |
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A man was surf fishing along the beach when he found a bottle. He looked around but didn't see anyone so he opened it A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, "I am so grateful to get out of that bottle that I will grant you any wish, but I can only grant one." The man thought for a while and finally said, "I have always wanted to go to Hawaii and fish along the beautiful beaches of Hawaii. I've never been able to go because I cannot fly. Airplanes are much too frightening for me. On a boat, I see all that water and I become very claustrophobic. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii." The genie thought for a few minutes and finally said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved. Consider all the piling needed to hold up a highway and how deep they would have to go to reach the bottom of the ocean. Imagine all the pavement needed. No, that really is just too much to ask." The man thought for a few minutes and then told the genie, "There is one other thing I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with, when they want attention, when they don't. Basically, what makes them tick." The genie thought for a while and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?" | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 55 | | |||
55. | The Fishing season hasn | Jokes Rating: |
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The fishing season hasn't opened and a fisherman who doesn't have a license, is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks "Any luck?" "Any luck? This is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday" he boasts. "Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am?" asks the stranger. "Nope." "Well, meet the new game warden." "Oh," gulped the fisherman. "Well, do you know who I am?" "Nope". "Meet the biggest liar in the state." | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 56 | | |||
56. | The Deserted Fisherman. | Jokes Rating: |
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The Deserted Fisherman. There was a salmon fisherman who was out in the ocean fishing when his boat sank. He was lucky enough to make to a deserted island where he had to survive on what he could find. When the Coastguard eventually found him, the leader noticed there was a fire pit with California Condor feathers all around. He went over to the fisherman and said, "You know, it's illegal to kill a California Condor, I'm afraid I'm going to have to arrest you." The fisherman protested for some time saying that he killed it because he was going to starve but eventually he calmed down. "Out of curiosity" the coastguard asked, "What did it taste like?" The fisherman replied, " Well, it was kind of a mix between a snowy owl and a bald eagle." | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 57 | | |||
57. | One day, two guys Joe and Bob were out fishing. A | Jokes Rating: |
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One day, two guys Joe and Bob were out fishing. A funeral service passes over the bridge they're fishing by, and Bob takes off his hat and puts it over his heart. He does this until the funeral service passes by. Joe then said "Gee Bob, I didn't know you had it in you!" Bob then replies " It's the least I could do. After all I was married to her for 30 years." | ||||||
Anonymous | 9th Apr 2003 | JokesID: 59 | | |||
58. | Cart Fishing | Jokes Rating: |
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Two fishermen were talking about the good old days.... One says, "when I was a kid there were so many fish here I could always catch a few." The other says, "when I was a kid here we used a horse and cart and got enough fish to sell at the market." "How did you do that then?" "Well, we had this good old horse and we used to back the cart down into the water and put treacle on his tail. The flies got stuck in the treacle and when the fish jumped out of the water for the flies that good old horse just kicked them into the cart. We had a load of fish in no time!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 20th Nov 2003 | JokesID: 77 | | |||
59. | Scientist | Jokes Rating: |
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What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them ! | ||||||
Anonymous | 20th Mar 2004 | JokesID: 88 | | |||
60. | A blonde decides to go fishing.... | Jokes Rating: |
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A blonde decides to go fishing. She stopped fishing when she caught a huge one. She was already too tired to carry it. | ||||||
Anymous | 12th Feb 2004 | JokesID: 84 | | |||
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