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Showing 61-69 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes score

61.

Fish trap

Jokes Score:

1351  



This fisherman goes to the river to check an illegal fish trap that he owns. He looks around to make sure there are no Fishing Inspectors about and proceeds to pull the fish trap out to check it.

An Inspector steps out of the bushes, "Ahha!" he said and the fisherman spun around and yelled "Shiiiit!". The Inspector, who wasn't expecting such a response said "Settle down, I'm the Fishing Inspector". "Thank God for that" said the fisherman, "I thought you were the bugger who owned this fish trap".



Leatherpot

10th Dec 2003

JokesID: 78

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62.

Cart Fishing

Jokes Score:

1342  



Two fishermen were talking about the good old days....

One says, "when I was a kid there were so many fish here I could always catch a few."

The other says, "when I was a kid here we used a horse and cart and got enough fish to sell at the market."

"How did you do that then?"

"Well, we had this good old horse and we used to back the cart down into the water and put treacle on his tail. The flies got stuck in the treacle and when the fish jumped out of the water for the flies that good old horse just kicked them into the cart. We had a load of fish in no time!"



Anonymous

20th Nov 2003

JokesID: 77

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63.

A blonde decides to go fishing....

Jokes Score:

1108  



A blonde decides to go fishing.

She stopped fishing when she caught a huge one. She was already too tired to carry it.



Anymous

12th Feb 2004

JokesID: 84

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64.

Scientist

Jokes Score:

702  



What do fish and women have in common?

They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them !



Anonymous

20th Mar 2004

JokesID: 88

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65.

There were these two men fishing. one was ...

Jokes Score:

469  



There were two men fishing on the river one day. One was catching all these fish and the other wasn't catching anything.


The man not catching any fish walked over and asked what the other guy was using for bait.


The fisherman reeled in his bait and said "river otter."



Poochunks man

22nd Mar 2004

JokesID: 90

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66.

Live bait

Jokes Score:

433  



A local fisherman returning from a fishing trip with 6 large size salmon in his creel. Nosy Parker comes along and asks if the man been fishing. "Yer!" replied our stalwart. Asked what bait he had been using our hero replied that he had used chewing tobacco. Nosey asked how one used chewing tobacco as bait, and our man replied, "I put the tobacco on the hook in the normal way, cast in the normal way and when the fish strikes I haul back on the line to hook it. When the fish comes up to spit, I hit it on the head with but of my rod!" Needless to say there were no more questions.



MDC

16th May 2004

JokesID: 93

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67.

Q: Where do fish keep their money?

Jokes Score:

31  



Q: Where do fish keep their money?

A: In the river bank.



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 8

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68.

An Irish priest loved to fly fish.....

Jokes Score:

22  



An Irish priest loved to fly fish, it was an obsession of his. So far this year the weather had been so bad that he hadn't had a chance to get his beloved wadders on and his favourite flies out of their box

Strangly though, every Sunday the weather had been good, but of course Sunday is the day he has to go to work.

The weather forcast was good again for the coming Sunday so he called a fellow priest claiming to have lost his voice and be in bed with the flu. He asked him to take over his sermon.

The fly fishing priest drove fifty miles to a river near the coast so that no one would recognise him. An angel up in Heaven was keeping watch and saw what the priest was doing. He told God who agreed that he would do something about it.

With the first cast of his line a huge fish mouth gulped down the fly. For over an hour the priest ran up and down the river bank fighting the fish. At the end when he finally landed the monster size fish it turned out to be a world record Salmon.

Confused the angel asked God, "Why did you let him catch that huge fish? I thought you were going to teach him a lesson."

God replied "I did. Who do you think he's going to tell?"



Anonymous

29th Jan 2003

JokesID: 40

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69.

Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting

Jokes Score:

18  



Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you ?"

"Why do you want me to throw them at you?"

"Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them."

"Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy."

"Why's that?"

"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take orange roughy. That's what she'd like for supper tonight."



Anonymous

16th Dec 2002

JokesID: 11

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